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  • pamz27


Updated: Dec 23, 2020

The emptiness created by childhood sexual abuse

I have always felt broken

Like a body cut in two

My body never feels right

It always fells like it’s in a fight

It’s in a fight

Between good and bad

Right and wrong

Weak and strong

It broke when I was a little girl

Not like broken bones

Much more painful than that

My soul broke

My body had a stroke

I could not feel

Or move the different parts

It broke from within

Like I had committed a sin

I was just nine when my body died

I was never able to make it alive

I could not feel

I could not heal

I tried to love

But my body did not respond

I just laid there as if I was numb

I felt so dumb

I tried to create life

But my body knew

You can not grow something inside

When you body is broken

It is a graveyard

Where things go to die

No matter how much I wanted to try

I was only able to cry

When your body is broken

You feel defeated

Like nothing good could never come

You must just succumb

To emptiness

It is a place where love goes to die

Where happiness cannot live

Where babies will not grow

Where vows do not sustain

Where all there is, is pain

That little girl tried so hard

Just to live

Just to be

She turned into an adult

That was scared to see

The reality that was me

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